Lessons Learned from Grandpa

My dad, or grandpa as I now call him, spends a lot of time at our house. He stops by just about every day or every other day. He usually stops by just in time, allowing me to step into another room for a breather. When he stops by I might even be able to take a shower that day. I really appreciate that from him! There is nothing like seeing the love that a grandpa and grandson have for each other. It gives me the warm fuzzies. However, grandpa has been teaching Mario some “life lessons” that I am not so sure about. These are some of them:

1. Teaching my toddler the unimportance of clothing. Being raised by a single dad was hard. There was no one in the house that could relate to the importance of fashion. He believed that a person only needed five shirts, five pants, and a pair of shoes. He has now taken it a step further. If he changes Mario’s diaper, he no longer bothers putting his pants back on. If Mario spills something on his shirt, grandpa just takes it off of him. Usually within five minutes of grandpa visiting, there is a naked toddler in the house. He also allows him to play outside like this. What is Mario going to learn from this? Clothing is totally optional in life.

2. Sugar is an actual food group, and can be consumed at all times of the day. Grandpa doesn’t seem to be able to tell time. How do I know this? Because it doesn’t matter if it is 7am or 7pm, if there is sugar within sight, it is going in my child’s mouth. Grandpa finds some kind of joy in jacking up my child and then abandoning us. This is the cruelest form of payback.

3. How to bark at dogs. Grandpa loves to take Mario on walks. It seems that in my neighborhood, everyone owns a dog. Grandpa likes to carry Mario, point at the dogs, and then show him how to bark. Finally Mario has learned the crucial life skill of barking. Now whenever we see dogs, cats, horses, or any other animal with four legs, my toddler barks. It was cute the first fifty times. Now it is just embarrassing.

4. Hitting is fun! Grandpa likes to play box with Mario, and Mario just cant seem to get enough of it! He starts laughing and giggling uncontrollably. I have to admit, it is pretty adorable. What isn’t adorable is when he goes to daycare and decides to play Mohammad Ali on the other children. He has already been “written up” for it once. If he gets kicked out of daycare because of boxing the other children, I sure hope grandpa will help watch him…

5. Coffee Coffee Coffee! Have you ever seen a toddler on coffee? I wish I could say I haven’t. Grandpa thinks its cute to be careless with where he places his coffee cup.