It is hard to believe in a world filled with books, parks, computers and the like, that children would ever utter the words: “Mom, I'm bored. There’s nothing to do”. Sometimes that is just a guise for the underlying longing to be noticed, to be part of something or to be held and embraced. If that be the case, please see to those vital needs in your child. Far too often, however, the bored child wants you as the mother to simply entertain them or to fill their days in endless hours of fun, excitement and joy. Realize that the “TV filled child” (or computer kid) who has been raised on a diet of canned entertainment can often become passive and just expect you to entertain them. Children have been known to create internal family chaos just wanting to be told what and how to spend their time.
Wait, wait! Don’t even go there. Mothers do not to fall into that trap. That is not in your job description to define each moment of their day. Please know that the genius people of the world came to be that way because they developed their imagination, almost from the moment they were born. Nobody gave them a pallet of tasks that incrementally developed their brains. No, no, no! As children they spent most of their time wondering, imagining, creating and filling their days with the joy of problem solving their way to success.
As toddlers and preschoolers they probably filled their days outside, barefoot and feeling the textures of nature against their skin. They might have experienced water play, sand play, cooking, dancing, making up songs, creating skits and plays and unnumbered other imaginative activities. As they matured they enjoyed climbing trees, exploring their environment and making remarkable things out of boxes, twigs, and other odd sorts of items. They were allowed to make a mess and probably even thrived on being messy. Yes, I know, we tidy mothers have a very hard time with that.
No matter what the age, they were probably provided open ended activities where there was not a “right answer” or expected product. They probably heard the words: “I wonder what you’ll create today.” This encouraged free thought. Most likely they were complimented as children on their ideas and creative endeavors more than how they looked.
All children have rich imaginations, but as mothers we can increase that potential. We can empower them with unstructured time to think, create, dream and wish. We can look for success in whatever unique things they accomplish.
On the other hand, I believe, every child needs direction in those areas where they have passion. Whether that passion is music, art, sports, writing, or something else, the guidance of an appropriate teacher, coach or professional advisor can inspire, motivate and provide skilled instruction to build that child’s abilities and confidence in the thing they want to do or become. Allow it! Provide it! Be an advocate for those things the child wants to do in their life that are good and wholesome and worthwhile.
Through the process of creative imagination and skilled tutoring an amazing well round human being will emerge and blossom into his own unique person. Such a combination will help your child enter the world with confidence and joy knowing they have become exactly who they wanted to be – through the process of self discovery as well as caring guidance.
Marilyn Dougall is the mother of 11 grown children and 26 grandchildren. Marilyn has a Bachelor of Science degree in Secondary Education and finds joy in teaching children and adults, serving in her church and community and her involvement in American Mothers. As such, she has been the Oregon Mother of the Year, State Search Chair, State President, National Resolution Chairman, National Area Coordinator as well as her current position as 2nd Vice President. She also presides over the Education Committee for American Mothers. Marilyn and her husband, John, reside in Oregon.